Met a man called Stewart Lee...

You may have seen him... that Stewart Lee. He's one of those things that they have these days... those comedians. You know, the comedian men that they have these days... they go up onto a sort of... raised platform and they look down at you, and tell you inane things about your life that you find hilarious and you agree with your laughter.

You know, the men with the sort of... big sticks that stick up from the platform that they are standing on... and they have a sort of device protruding from the stick. A kind of... a device that you see that all the kids use, and it makes the comedian man's voice that bit louder so you can hear them over the sound of the laughter that is coming out of your mouth hole.

You've seen them right? The comedian men... the ones on the platforms with the sticks and the devices that the kids use, and they speak in a loud voice about all the inane things that happen in your life, and you laugh out of your face and they keep talking and talking and making noises about appliances that aren't made very well and drawers with all bits of stuff in them and you feel that somehow they know things that you don't.

Yeah well, I met one of those. His name was Stewart Lee.